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Writer's pictureBrooke Ackerman

What did you say?

Updated: Feb 26, 2023

In several recent conversations I’ve had with others, the phrase “glorify God” has popped up. In each instance, I’ve asked the person who said the phrase, “What does ‘glorify God’ mean to you?” And what has been fascinating to me is every person paused for longer than you might expect and then eventually said something along the lines of, “I’m not really sure…but…” and then went on to describe what the phrase means to them.


I am so intrigued that each person didn’t have a ready answer to “What do you mean when you say that phrase?” but so quickly fired off the phrase in conversation. Do we really know what we’re saying? In an earlier blog post, A Shift in Perspective, I pointed out that words matter and how we use words matters. If this is true, then why are we throwing around words - that are connected to ideas - when we don’t even really know what we mean when we say them?


When we speak or think words, ideas are created in our minds and also potentially in the minds of whomever we may be in conversation with. I think it can be dangerous to use words without really knowing what we mean when we say them because words become thoughts, thoughts become ideas, and ideas become beliefs. (Thanks to Bob and Polly Hamp at Think Differently Academy for this paradigm shift!)


I’ll share an example from my own life. A little over ten years ago, it wouldn’t have been uncommon for you to hear me say the words, “I hate my hair!” I have very curly hair, and for most of my younger days, I was not happy with my curls. When I was very young (elementary school age and younger), I happily received and believed the compliments that people paid me. Then came the middle school and high school years. My thoughts about my hair began to drastically change due to a few negative comments from others and the “makeover” scenes in movies. You know the ones…the girl has curly, frizzy hair, wears eyeglasses, and dresses in a way that most believe to be out of fashion. Someone comes along for whatever reason to give her a makeover. They straighten her hair, get her some contact lenses, and take her shopping for new clothes. Voila! Now, she’s attractive. But there’s no way she could have been thought of as pretty if she had curly hair, glasses, and wore what she liked.

Because of a few offhand comments - words others spoke to me - I began to think my hair was ugly (or at least not as pretty as girls with straight hair), and eventually, I believed my hair was ugly. It would be too long to share here, but through a lovely chain of events during my 30s, which maybe I’ll share another time, I began to love my hair. Truly love it! I was able to finally embrace my curls and think of them as beautiful. But the strange thing was, in the beginning of that time of newly loving my hair, I found myself saying things like, “My hair is so frizzy!” or some other negative statement when someone complimented my curls. I no longer actually believed that about my hair, but the words would come tumbling out of my mouth seemingly without any thought.



Because I had said negative things about my hair for so long, those negative ideas became firmly established in my mind. I believed my hair was ugly. Until I didn’t. So, why did I continue to say those negative words “without thinking”? I had changed my behavior (no longer saying unkind things about myself), but my thoughts and beliefs hadn’t caught up yet. Thankfully, it didn’t take very long for my thoughts and beliefs to catch up, but it was an interesting process to watch myself move through. Once I was able to accept and love the way God had designed me, the negative words and thoughts about my hair that seemed so near the surface melted away.


Interestingly, one of the people who used the phrase “glorify God” without really knowing what she meant by it was also on a journey to accepting and loving the way God designed her. She had shared with me that, because she is a Christian, she thought there was a certain way she should be speaking and acting, a certain image she should be offering to the world. She was afraid if she didn’t meet the perceptions others had of what it meant to be Christian, then she wasn’t truly glorifying God. She admitted she had become very concerned about what others thought of her and was exhausted by trying to do what she thought everyone expected of her.


I asked her what kinds of things she thought people expected of her, especially since she is a Christian, and she rattled off a list of several things - all of which were focused on her actions and behavior. As a recovering “do-er,” I wasn’t entirely surprised! She and I continued discussing the difference between doing and being. I pointed out to her that God loves all of the wonderful things she’s able to do. All of those things she’s able to do, after all, are gifts from Him, but they aren’t the main reason why God delights in her. I wish I could adequately describe to you her facial expression when I asked her, “What if ‘glorifying God’ isn’t so much about what you do but who you are?” I could see this was not something she had considered about herself before, and so I continued, “You are the only you this world has, and that’s what the world needs more of…you being you. What if being exactly who God designed you to be is the best way to ‘glorify God’?”


It was honestly one of the most delightful conversations I’ve had with someone in a long time! Getting back to the original design - the blueprint - is the best thing each of us can offer the world. Being exactly who you are designed to be is what the world needs.


I’d love to talk more with you about this! Please feel free to send me an email or schedule some one-on-one time with me. And consider subscribing to my blog, where I post lots of helpful suggestions on how you can begin (and continue) this journey of recovering your blueprint!



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